here in this place

This hour surprised me.

I am unprepared, with only 58% battery remaining on my laptop and no power cord to extend my time.

My time here, at Panera, somewhere off of 60 in Clearwater.

I was supposed to be back at it. Back to Mommy-business and chores and preparing for Saturday’s ladies’ dinner. But Cathy, my gracious mom-in-law, called and told me not to hurry home from my night out with old college friends.

I could meander a little longer.

So, here’s where I find myself…

My life is full right now.

Neal and I are in such a good place in our marriage. We’re partnering with each other in ministry, learning how to appreciate each other’s unique skills and passions and refraining from projecting our own expectations of ourselves onto the other. And we’re in love. And it’s so good.

Carter is a rollercoaster ride of discovery. Just this morning, on the phone, he repeated several times,

“I’m fixing to get ready to go to the park.”

What? You’re what to get ready to go to the park? He was clearly frustrated with me when he handed the phone back to his grandmother.

Did my son just use the phrase fixing to?

I didn’t use the phrase “fixing to” until…never.

And that’s the impressionable, smart, son I have. I am stuffed full with a sense of contented joy because God has chosen for Carter’s life to intersect with mine. 

We are full of anticipation, wondering what to expect from a second son, waiting to meet him and discover his uniqueness. He reminds me of his presence whenever I let my blood sugar get too low, with a kick or two or four. 

Ministry is hopeful.

After an-unspecified-amount-of-time, God has recently reached down and interjected a Great Pause in the discouragement we had been enduring. We’ve befriended a group of new-ish Christ followers and are in awe, all over again, of How God Works.

Marriages on the brink of divorce restored.

Porn quit.

Drinking abandoned.

Baptisms and confessions of faith and Brand-New-Fresh-Leather-Bibles bought…and read.

Stories whispered, in the confidence of just two, of God speaking.

Is that supposed to happen? Does God really speak to us like that?

Yes. Yes, He does.

With all of this beauty, I’m strengthening my resolve to be contented in this place. To reject the ever-tempting desire to fantasize about the Land of Tomorrow.

Right now, right here, in my place in life and with a laptop with only 40% life remaining,

I can call this good.

And I’m so thankful to my God for bringing me here.